Taking a good long look

I feel like I was a totally different person when I was completely head-over-heels for Law.


I know right now that I don't have those overwhelming feelings inside of me but who knows, my heart might jump again the next time I see him.


I have been reading a lot lately and in a way, I guess it's a way for me to express my depression.


At least I'm not eating and snacking to get over it like what I did the last time.


The books I've been reading are really amazing and I love the author a lot.


You should check out Haruki Murakami and if you're not ready yet for his bizarre but spectacular stories, you should start out with The Elephant Vanishes.


Anyway, I'm currently reading Kafka on the Shore and there are so many lines and quotes in there that I can really identify with. Those words just jumped off the page into my mind.


"...even in the smallest events there's no such thing as coincidence."


There was no coincidence that I met him and that I fell for him and no other guy in school.


I actually believe in fate as much as I want to deny this fact because I sometimes don't like the idea that I'm not in control of my own life.


There are many other nice quotes but I'm not exactly in the mood to look for them now cause I need to take a short break from reading his works cause I actually need to think long and hard when I read his books because as I read I analyse as well.




I wonder if he will ever remember me.


I wonder if the times we worked together and the times that I did catch him looking at me were lucky coincidences.




I still have my share of regrets which I pray will eventually lighten up and disappear.




Going to sleep now cause I'm going for a stress workshop tomorrow. Hopefully it'll help me one way or another.

We should never cry for more bread when our baskets are filled with loaves

How should I put this?


It's awesome and everything for me to go on liking Law but that doesn't mean he'll return my feelings for him.


I'm blaming the cause of this small state of slight depression on the Magic Crystal Ball application on Facebook.


I know it's all just crap and everything but still.


I was occupied with a whole lot of quiz, horoscopes, predictions and love calculators just now cause I'm kind of procrastinating before I get on with my homework which isn't much anyway.


Both of the love calculator and horoscope match contradicted each other to the max.


According to the calculator, my chances with Law is pretty slim but according to the horoscope match, he is the perfect match for me.


Highly amusing, as usual.


My love prediction for today is "Your admirer will approach you soon" or something like that cause I closed the browser before I had the chance to copy and paste the prediction.


Amusing, again.


Today, my sisters and I went to a newly opened library in town and I saw some Star Wars books and out of curiosity, I started reading one of them because Law likes Star Wars and the story seemed interesting enough so I became a member of the library and borrowed the book.


I borrowed the oldest copy that I could find.

Published in 1995

I just saw a couple of reviews about it just now and things didn't look to peachy.

Apparently, it's a book from a disappointing series.

I wanted to take Star Wars:Fate of the Jedi, BACKLASH initially but the font was too huge and if Law caught me reading that book, I'd look like a kid.

At least the book I borrowed has small font.

But the latter looks more interesting. 

I'll get started on reading the former after I finish my maths homework (not a lot thank goodness).

Law's actually indirectly getting me to read again which is a hobby I've not cultivated seriously in a long time.

I must not be afraid of taking risks if any opportunity (that isn't stupid) cause this will be the last week for the both of us to be working together.

I'm praying that I'll get to work together with him.

Now, I must study.