All the way home

And no, I don't mean it in the sexual way hahahaha.

I honestly, honestly thought that today would be a very bad day. Why? I only got two hours or so of sleep and I didn't have much for breakfast.

When I got to class, the professor wasn't there (she came late, typical Italian timing) and by the time I got in line so that she could check my work, I was number 12 and I wanted to finish early so that I could go back home fast and sleep.

Well, guess what?

I gave up my 12th spot to another for the 19th and again from the 19th to the 24th. Why? Because I rather see myself suffer than see others in torture, especially if they have better things to do than me.

But I actually felt less depressed and much better after doing those small tiny acts of kindness. I even gave a homeless woman some coins because I'm sure she's way more hungry than I am. It felt good to give back to the world.

Also, I talked with both Tia and Rosa today (on separate occasions that is) about Prince and they both thought that he wasn't pissed off with me, just that he was in a bad mood. Tia even went so far as to think that he's interested in me and he's in a conflict with a girl or with Carl about me and yes, that would be a fantasy but I highly doubt it. It really made me feel better to talk about these things with someone, although I was positively blushing the whole time. I can't believe that I can blush so easily these days. I never could when I was a child and oh how my younger self wished she could and now she can. You happy now?

But anyway, how does all of this relate to Prince?

First off, he came only in the afternoon and I didn't want to believe it at first (since I got such a short glimpse of him) but I know that I can't mistake him for another person. He confirmed his presence for me though, by writing his name on the blackboard.

I have a feeling that he kind of overheard my conversation with either Tia or Rosa but I also doubt it since we were talking in low voices in front of the class while he was sitting at the back.

After my turn, I just knew I wanted to talk and apologise to him. It's because I watched a YouTube video last night, a motivational one, about how we can make ourselves better by thinking "How do I make today the best day of my life?" so I was eager to try it out.

Besides, my lack of sleep prevents any rational thinking so it was the perfect time despite the rising fear in my heart.

I actually had two choices.

1. To exit through his side (since he was sitting next to the main door).
2. To exit through the back door. Which has Carl. Who suddenly came back. After having finished his turn 2 hours ago. =-=;

Naturally I actually wanted to avoid Prince's door but thanks to Carl, I chose option 1. Luckily.

So I was opening the door, carrying a heck load of things with me, thinking that Prince would probably not notice me but he actually stopped to look at me and my insane amount of baggage for awhile and I took that as a 'Go' sign to talk with him. And thus, I did.

I can't remember exactly how it went but I'm sure I opened it up with a "Prince, I'm really sorry about yesterday." and I probably added "I'm sure you were in a bad mood" and "I'm sorry for always annoying you" to that mixture as well to which he responded in mumbles of "No, no" and I think I even heard him say either "It was my fault" or "It's not your fault".

But what made me smile all the way home was the fact that the second I spoke to him, he grinned and his eyes were the same friendly looking eyes like last time.

It really seemed like the smile of an angel's and if I had been alone in the hallway, I tell you I would've cried in relief and joy.

Really.

I immediately felt a weight being lifted from my shoulders and I felt my face lighting up and I smiled back at him and the eye contact we made was magical again.

He had very positive body language as well; his whole upper part turning to face me as we talked.

I forgot to mention two things about the Switzerland trip.

While we sat side-by-side on the first night, he had a very open body language with me, sitting with his legs wide apart and him sinking in his seat so I know that he was comfortable sitting next to me.

Also, I had a really long dream about him that first night and I don't know about what. I had another dream about him last night as well but I don't know about what either.

But anyway, I am just super relieved and happy and glad and overjoyed that he grinned at me.

And I will stop here for today because I am tired and I think I will cook dinner now and then sleep and then wake up and take a shower before working. I really need to rest and I think my body clock is seriously out of whack now.

Thank you so much, God, for today. :)

The Grin

Okay.


Let me go through this chronologically and I hope that I'll get to remember every single detail as tired as I am right now.


During the second break, Law had to take his class photo wearing an office outfit and somehow, I really wanted to see him in that kind of outfit because, that was kind of what he wore when I first met him at the Mooting competition last year.


So as I was going down the stairs to the ground floor, I saw that he was standing in front of the staircase, talking with his friends and so I looked at him.


And then, he looked at me as well.


And as usual, I averted my eyes but when I looked back at him, he was looking elsewhere so I just took a deep breath and continued walking towards the canteen.


Then, I chose a seat where I could see him from the canteen and then Elva and Jean joined me.


Then, June came up to me and said "You guys should come and sit over here where Anne (another friend of mine who knows about Law) is. She's alone."


I must tell you, I was torn between remaining at my seat and sitting with Anne and June but then I remembered what Barney said and I quote "Bros before hoes" so I got up and dragged Jean with me to sit with Anne and June.


We made small talk after that but we kind of focused on eating lunch.


Then, I saw Law pass by and he sat at a table two tables away in front of me with his back facing me cause he was talking with his friends.


When I looked away to my left, I saw Susie (one of my seniors who took care of my group during the Leadership Camp) and then I got all happy and stood up, clutching Catching Fire in my hands.

Me: Susie! *She turned around and looked at me* Here you go!

Susie: Oh! Thank you so much!

Me: Your welcome! I'm so sorry I had it for such a long time and I only gave it to you now.

Susie: Oh, it's okay.

Me: I 'll give you Mockingjay as soon as I finish reading it and I'm very close to finishing it already.

Susie: Oh, thank you!

Jean: Oh, you like Hunger Games as well?

Susie: Yes.

Me: Are you going to go watch it this Thursday? I think the weekends are probably fully booked already.

Jean: Thursday's the premier right?

Me: Ya, but I only got us the third show at 6.10 pm.

Susie: Oh, I'm going to watch it on Friday.

And somehow, it got a bit awkward cause I was talking with Susie and Jean was kind of interrupting our conversation so in order to not make it awkward I said "Bye" to Susie in a happy voice and she smiled back before walking away.

To Law's table.

I have no idea why I was just staring at her from the moment she walked away but when she sat down beside Law and started talking about stuff, it took me a full minute to realise she was talking with him.

And that he was holding Catching Fire with his two hands.

I think she handed it to him before she sat down and began talking with him.

And I also have no idea why, but, I just kept on looking at the both of them talking and smiling and laughing.

And that was when the unexpected happen.

Law did a full 180 degree turn to face behind him and then he looked at me.

And he gave me a huge grin.

It took my brain a long time to process this thought and I'm still not sure what emotion was portrayed on my face when that happened (most probably shock).

But the next thing I knew, I bent my head down and I sought for the shelter of the crook of my arm.

And I was blushing.

Since I'm not really fair or anything, when I blush, it's not really that obvious but when I finally looked up (the head bending thing probably lasted for only 5 seconds but it felt like hours), my cheeks were feeling hot.

I know that I wasn't dreaming because June and Anne were there.

The minute he grinned at me, both of them said "OMG BETH HE'S SMILING AT YOU."

And then they both proceeded to console me by saying that he indeed looked at me and smiled at me.

I knew my blush was serious because June said to me "OMG BETH YOU'RE BLUSHING!!!" and when I reached up to touch my cheeks, they were extremely hot. 

My whole face was hot.

And they remained hot all the way till school ended.

Now when I touch my cheeks, I'm wondering, how the hell did they get so freaking hot?!

Law turned to face the front after that and began reading the book by opening the pages slightly and he continued to hold it when Susie went to buy her food up till the moment Susie returned with her food.

Anyway, when Law got up to leave and passed by me, I realised that I needed to find Angel to give her her invitation to the party on Saturday so I got up and after sending my plates to the basin, June and I began to walk to the main entrance.

I thought that Law would be way ahead of me by then but there he was, right in front of me as we were climbing up the stairs.

He got off at the third floor with his friends though while June and I continued to go up but I somehow felt like I was being watched but I didn't dare to look down.

And that's that.

I can't believe I acted so stupidly like a huge fool in front of him.

I should've smiled back at him, give him two thumbs up (which is what I normally do) and then I should have tried to strike up a conversation with him regarding Catching Fire.

That book now has his essence all over it. XD

But in a way, I was being me but I just hope that he doesn't think I'm rude.

Because there are two possible things that he might have thought of then.

A] He thought I was rude and weird.

B] He knows I like him.

I was clutching my face and head so much that another one of my seniors (let's call her Blair) had to ask me if I was under stress or something. So I told her about what happened in a summarised form but I left out his name.

Then she said, "Why don't you just say "Hi!" the next time you see him?" to which I responded by saying "He-He's a scary guy."

And then I turned around and fled.

Okay, I'll just stop here for now cause it's almost 12.30 am and I'm getting my SPM results in 10 hours and I need to look presentable at least.

I hope that I'll get another chance like this and I pray that I won't be stupid then.

His smile really made my day and just thinking about what happened makes me super happy. :)


PS. I actually really wanted to give Susie the book yesterday but looks like it was a good thing I didn't. God had different plans for me. My lecturers told me that I will be awarded with happiness while we were attending morning prayer. Looks like it came true! :)


Also, June said I look a bit like Ivy. Whaaaaaaat?