Liebster Award Tag

Was actually tagged by Josephine (http://carefreecentral.blogspot.com) a few days ago but I never had the time and now that I'm waiting for my hair to dry, I might as well complete this. :)


But before I commence, I just want to say that I finally bought book one of Kimi ni Todoke which cost me a lot of money but it is totally worth it.


Not going to read or open it until I'm at home and then I'll wrap it before I even read it.


And now, I shall finally begin! :D


I'm ignoring the tagging rules though cause I don't know any other blogger.


The Liebster Award

• The Liebster Blog Award is given to upcoming bloggers who have less than 200 followers.

• The Meaning; Liebster is German and means sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovely, kind, pleasant, valued, cute, endearing, and welcome.

The Rules:

1. Each person must post 11 things about themselves.

2. Answer the questions the tagger has set for you plus create 11 questions for the people you've tagged to answer.

3. Choose eleven people and link them in your post.

4. Go to their page and tell them.

5. Remember, no tag backs!

11 Facts About Myself

1.   I am a hopeless romantic. Like really hopeless.

2.   I almost always fall asleep in class, especially during Biology and Physics. Surprisingly though, my lecturers never get pissed at me even though I'm sitting right in front of them.
3.   I have extra extra extra sensitive skin.
4.   I eat a whole lot and I exercise a whole lot as well.
5.   The first thing I always look at when I see a guy is his hair cause I can judge what type of person he is by his hairstyle.

6.   I am a HUGE BOICE i.e. CNBLUE fan. (Bias: Lee Jong Hyun XD)

7.   I love reading and drawing but I simply adore day-dreaming.

8.   My all-time favourite slice-of-life/josei/shoujo mangas are Kimi wa Petto and Kimi ni Todoke.

9.   I love love love the beach and I wouldn't mind just staring at it and the sky for the whole day.

10. I somehow always imagine Law and I driving up to this specific beach at a resort and just spending time together by talking, walking and looking at the beach. (The perfect date)

11. I am really really shy and people always mistook that to be arrogance.

Questions From JennyHollyway!

1. Your favourite model? 

I don't really know all the famous ones (unlike my sister, Summer) but I think Analeigh from America's Next Top Model is very pretty. High fashion... not sure.

2. Best place for your wedding?

A really nice church. :)

3. What is your weight?

55 kg? Slightly less and hoping it'll go down even more.

4.  What is your growth?

Around 163 cm. Roughly 5'3' I guess.

5. What are you thinking about alcohol and cigarettes?

Alcohol is okay in small amounts and even though the smell of cigarettes is nice, it's really bad.

6. What is your secret wish?

To be closer with Law and to talk with him and to become one of his closest friends.

7. J-rock or K-pop? (or ..?)

Darnigans. I like both but with the kind of K-Pop these days... I think I'd rather go for J-Rock.

8. What kind of shoes do you prefer?

Flats and sneakers and the occasional high heels. XD

9. Justin Bieber is .. ?? :D

Not attractive.

10. How much hours do you sleep eyery day?

3 to 4 hours. I don't know how to sleep for longer than that already cause that's what college life (and Tetris) does to you.

11. How grandmother would you be in old age? :D
Maybe quite grandmother-ish. Never been the type to be very extroverted.

Questions from Mischa!

1. What would you do if you could travel in time?
I'd go back to the beginning of this year and advice myself to have the courage to talk to Law. And also to study hard for my exam last year.

2. What's your favourite piece of clothing? (It could be something you used to own, something you own now, something you want...etc.)
Super super over-sized hoodies. And practically any type of baggy clothes. They're super comfortable.

3. A motto in your native language you frequently repeat?
I don't really speak my native language much but I guess it could be "Buli ba kalau kau" XD

4. Favourite poem lines?
So many. I can recite Wilfred Owen's Dulce et Decorum est by heart and I just love Thomas Hardy's The Man He Killed. So many thanks to my Literature in English teacher. :)
5. What's your favourite time waster?
Facebook. Blogger. Twitter. Day-dreaming yet again. Thinking.
6. What places would you like to travel the most?
South Korea, Japan, Austria. Anywhere with beautiful scenery.  :) 

7. What is the accomplishment you're most proud of?
Becoming a more open person this year who is able to talk a bit more and is less reserved and quiet. But most of all, being able to text with someone that I like and to talk with him (which I really thought I'd never get to do).

8. If you could be a character from any movie, who would you be?
Snow White? Mulan? Someone who's soft and gentle and yet courageous.
9. What's your favourite quote? 
"Everything happens for a reason." Not exactly a quote but I always say that to myself.
10. Do you remember your dreams?
Only certain ones. Like nightmares and also like about people that I like. (Like Law)

11. What's your favourite sound?
The sea breeze. The stillness of the night with the faint sound of crickets and a gently crackling fire. The wind howling. Almost any sound that nature makes.  :) 

Questions from Josephine!

1.   Why did you decide to make a blog?

Because I don't know how to express myself truly and thoroughly in real life. Because I don't know how to really confide in people without the fear of being judged. To just see and record my life so I can re-read them back. To express my feelings for the people I like.

2.   Favourite food?

I don't have one, sadly. I just like trying new stuff all the time. :)

3.   What colour are your room walls?

A sad cream peach that's faded to almost a off-white colour.

4.   Oreos or choc chip cookies, and WHY?

Chocolate chips cookies. Cause you can make them bigger! XD

5.   Your dream date?

Talking and walking by the beach from late afternoon till late at night or maybe even until the next day so we can see the sunrise together while talking inside the car.

6.   Best feature in a guy, explain your dream guy!

His eyes. When they sparkle, your whole world lights up. Black hair, dark brown eyes (cause black eyes are impossible), really cute grin, at least taller than me. That's physically. Mentally and emotionally, someone who is passionate, confident, able to speak well, nice, kind. Can speak English well. Understand and get's stuff that I get. Isn't metrosexual.

Actually... all of those points describe Law really well. He could possibly be my dream guy.

7.   Western or Asian make-ups?

On me, Asian. But both looks are really pretty. :)

8.   Your current favourite piece of clothing/accessory/shoes?

Uh... My 2011 Drama Team shirt? (Cause it has a 'C' at the back *slaps self*)

9.   Your favourite chocolate, or your favourite fruit? Maybe both?

Dark chocolate. Like really dark. But I like the others too. I love all types of fruit too but I'm allergic to honeydew.

10. Favourite fast food outlet? Or favourite place to eat?

Possibly McDonalds. Can't think of anything else.

11. The place that you most want to travel to?

South Korea, I guess.

I really think of him too much.

Got to sleep soon. :)

I really want to text him but I don't know what to say.

Funny how...

I still think about you even though you probably don't even think of me.


It's annoying sometimes how I can completely forget about him sometimes and then when I least expect it, especially at school, I'll suddenly see or hear something and I'm right back in the water, thinking about how lucky I was to have been able to see him almost everyday for the first few months of this year.


I know that he said it's okay for me to text him whenever but then again, I don't want to disturb him much less annoy him and besides, I have no idea how to begin a text without actually seeing him somewhere.


I think the reason that I've went out so much in the past week is that I keep on hoping to meet him somewhere but I haven't.


It makes me wonder whether or not all those chance meetings were a hoax or not.


Recently, last Friday, I reconnected with one of my old high school friends, Jasmine, and I told her stuff about Law and she told me to not text him and that I should wait for him to text me.


I know for sure that there's no way in hell that he'd ever get the urge to text me.


Why would he?


We weren't particularly close.


Just thinking about how long this feeling has been and how it has grown really makes me feel amazed that I actually went through all these experiences.


I just wish that I could have the chance to see him every single day again and get closer with him.




Last night, my mom asked me to never date young but Rainie and Skye said that it'd be better if I did cause then I'd have more experience and besides, when should I start to get experience if not from a young age?


I'm not really hoping for a boyfriend though but maybe a close guy friend so that I can see how such a relationship can progress.


A guy that I can truly be my tomboy-ish, completely unfeminine, gamer attitude self around with.


Unfortunately though, almost every single guy my age fear talking to me and sad to say, I think it's cause I seem to exude more authority than them.


And unfortunately, the only guy that I can see right now who might be able to understand me is Law and I really want to smack my forehead and face for that. =-=;




I wonder when I'll see Law again.


Come to think of it, this blog wasn't how I thought it'd end up being.


I thought that I'd be writing letters to my celebrity crushes and stuff but never this and never did I imagine him.




When will I see you again?

A thousand words

I feel so freaking stupid.


Have I never even considered how he felt about me being so upfront about everything???


As far as I can see, he didn't take a picture with any other junior but me and I do feel slightly happy because of that but honestly, I bet he felt slightly awkward what with me suddenly talking like that.


But yet again, he said he is a nice guy and that he doesn't mind me disturbing him.


And, he's not pissed at me.


And, I caught him looking at me yesterday so aren't all of those good signs?


I mean, like when I knew that Roy was interested in me, I didn't try to catch a glimpse of him at school.


Well, I did look at him sometimes but only cause I wondered why he was interested in me.


The main point here is that I did not try to look at him the way that Law tried to look at me.


Recently, I told one of my high school friends, Lilia, about Law and she asked me to ask him out which is certainly an extremely daring move. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.


She said that he also kind of seemed interested in me and I can only keep hoping that that's true.


Anyway, the actual point of me blogging today is that I made a complete fool of myself today early in the morning and Law wasn't even there physically but I still blushed.


I was telling a couple of my friends that I took a picture with him and that June uploaded it on Facebook when one of them had the bright idea to use her iphone to log into Facebook to check it out and then I completely over-reacted and I have no idea why.


Roy was in the next table and he kept on glancing our way probably cause I was too loud. The other kids at that table were also looking my way.


I have a feeling that this will spread.


All my friends wanted to like it but I forbade them so they settled to bully me until June arrived.


I felt really happy though that they said we looked cute together cause we both looked like anime characters.


One of them even said we looked alike and that we had the same smile.


When I looked at the picture just now for a long time, I finally managed to admit that it looks pretty decent and quite good.


He looks really calm although there is a slight hint of awkwardness in his eyes.


I asked June what she thought of his conversation with me (cause she was there throughout that whole time) and she said that she was only looking at him to see his reaction.


She said that he was just smiling the whole time and his eyes were big.


I knew I wasn't imagining it when I said his eyes looked bigger than usual.


Ariel said that it was okay that I touched his shoulder cause then it made me look less like I'm afraid of him.


Come to think of it, I don't think I'm afraid of him anymore. I just really like him and I really want to be his friend.


Lilia suggested that I only text him after a week and I think that that's a good idea.


Anyway, I have to sleep cause I have a Chemistry pop quiz tomorrow.


I hope that Law and I will become closer. :)

Coincidence

You know, I thought that after last night, I wouldn't see him again for a long time.


Well, guess what folks?


I met him today.


Again.


For the third day in a row.


Is this a hoax or something???


Previously, I never saw him outside of school and now when he already graduated, I see him in random places.


It's really pure luck, chance, coincidence, etc.




My sisters and I went out for lunch today since Skye and Rainie were dying to eat decent Pan Mien so we went to our usual shop, not more than a 10 minute drive from my house (if there's no traffic that is).


Then, when we finished, we called our driver but he said that he was still eating lunch so we decided to go to a cafe and drink bubble tea.


The minute we turned into the shop, I saw him.


He was wearing a black shirt and he was sitting with a guy but I didn't stare for too long cause I knew if I did, I'd end up making a fool out of myself so I pretended to not see him.


After placing our order, we went upstairs while he remained downstairs.


We chatted away as we waited for our drinks but it took a much longer time than usual that we sent Summer down to get the drinks since our driver arrived already.


When she came back up she said that the machines were down so we had to wait some more.

Summer: I also saw uncle (our driver) pass the cafe so I waved at him and then Law saw me waving.

Me: Are you trolling me??? (Cause she always does)

Summer: I might be smiling but I'm telling the truth.

We waited for another 10 minutes and then Skye and Rainie sent me to inform our driver about the delay even though I said I could have just easily called him.

I didn't dare to look in his direction while I went out but when I came back and was walking up the stairs, I stole a glance in his direction with my eyes and I saw him leaning back a bit in his seat and he was looking at me.

It was obvious.

I just continued up as calmly as I could but I died the minute I got to the table.

We were super noisy after that. Hahahaha. XD

We got drunk from bubble tea. XD

Then when our drinks came, we went down and again, I didn't dare to look in his direction but when we were in the car, Rainie told me that he looked at me again.

I feel so happy. :)

I have decided not to text him about seeing him cause I don't want to seem to eager but yet again, I don't know if I'll get the chance again.

But yet again, I don't want to seem too desperate so I won't.

I saw a prom picture of him and Ivy together on Facebook.

She had her arm around him and she placed it on his shoulder.

Both her close friends liked it.

He was smiling but it didn't seem as though he was into her, kind of. I don't know how to put it.

On the other hand, June uploaded my picture with him on Facebook just now and I didn't dare to look at it.

Then, Rainie started screaming Skye and Summer's name over and over and initially, I didn't suspect anything but then I realised I knew why.

I eventually went to see it, but not in close up.

From what I could see, he had this really happy and calm look on his face and I was smiling quite okay.

Going off topic a bit, I need to lose some weight cause my arms are really big. Urgh.

Even if I do have muscles, I need to become smaller.

I don't look good, haih... :(

I need to continue to improve my looks and become a bit more smaller.

Isn't it weird that I keep on seeing him more often now that he's out of school as opposed as to when he was still in school?

Okay, got to go soon cause I need to get in contact with a prospective university in Italy. :)

The final evening

Today was my prom day! :)


My sisters were really nice enough to put so much effort in making me look presentable and I actually felt quite pretty. I got compliments from a lot of people and that just boosted my confidence up even more.


When he first came, I couldn't find him in the crowd until much later and by then everyone had to enter the hall.


Because of my heels, I was way taller than him cause my heels were around 3.5 till 4 inches tall and were boosted by platforms as well. =-=


Anyway, I shall tell all the encounters that I had with him today. :)


The first one, Ariel and I had to go around, asking the Prom King and Prom Queen nominees to get ready outside the hall for their grand entrance, so we went over to the senior's side and I saw where he sat.


He looked really good. Like really really really good.


He was handsome.


Oh sheep, I'm so cheesy but I can't help it because he really did.


Even if he didn't follow the theme (vintage vogue) and only put on a regular suit, to me, he was the best one of the best ones.


Anyway, I was scanning the crowd of seniors when I saw him and his friend turn to look at me and he looked at me for a very long time.


I mean like, if you saw someone, you'd just glance and then turn back to your table, but he didn't.


He was still staring when Ariel and I left and I felt a bit happy.


I went on stage twice cause I was the girl holding the lucky draw bowl and at certain points, my knees shook.


I don't know if it was because I had been in them for over an hour or whether it was because I knew that he was in the crowd.


At the end of prom, I made my way to the senior's table after a moment's hesitation and I began talking and taking photos with some of my seniors, Blair and Melrose included.


He was still standing there and he was really close to us at one point but I was still too afraid to approach him and to talk with him.


Besides, he was hanging out a lot with Angel and a couple more of other friends.


Then, he went out and I began feeling upset and started beating myself up in my mind.


And so, I went out to find him, feeling lost because most of my friends were gone and then I got scared cause I couldn't find him so I thought that he left already.


Then, I saw him, still hanging out with Angel and the rest.


I slowly approached them, talking with other seniors and taking more photos with my friends when suddenly I was right next to them.


Then, Angel and I chatted for a bit before we took a photo together.


She's really nice. :)


While Angel and I were taking our photo, he turned around and left so I got really disappointed and sad.


For the next 5 minutes, I couldn't find him and when I did, he was inside the hall and I didn't dare to go in.


So I went over to June whom I finally got the chance to hang out with for a bit cause she was busy from the moment prom started and we took a couple of photos together as well as with some of our other friends.


I told June how I felt and she asked me if I wanted to take a photo with him and I said 'yes' but I couldn't cause I didn't have a camera.


"Never mind la! You can borrow mine!"


Her words made my night.


Really.


Thank you so much.


Then, Law came out from the hall with Angel and I got slightly panicked.

Me: How am I supposed to take a picture with him? I don't know what to say!

June: Never mind, I'll ask Angel to take a photo with us both and then you can take a picture with him!

So the three of us took a picture, him being the photographer (wonder if Angel thought that was weird since I already took a photo with her) and then he gave back the camera and was about to turn away when I stopped him.

Me: Wait, Law. Let's all take a photo. :)

June: Yes, the three of you.

Law: Sure.

And then, we stood next to each other, Angel to his right and I to his left.

But suddenly, Angel kind of left him and I there so June said "Never mind la, just the two of you."

I really wonder why she did that. Did she know that I only wanted to take a picture with him and so decided to help me? She just walked out from the frame and looked at Law and I for a while before she turned around and left.

And so, I now have a real picture of him and I together. :)

I didn't want to waste that moment so I decided to just talk to him.

Me: Law, is it okay if I ask you something? Do I annoy you?

Law: No!

Me: Are you pissed with me???

Law: No! *Grins* I'm just like that. (Referring to him not replying my text)

Me: Oh, good! Cause I was scared that you were pissed at me. 

Law: *Grins* I'm a nice guy.

Me: So you don't mind me SMS-ing you or anything?

Law: No! Of course not.

Me: So it's okay if I do SMS you anytime?

Law: Of course. I'm a nice guy.

Me: It's okay if I ask you for game tips right?

Law: Ya. *Nods*

Me: I'm going to miss seeing you in school.

Law: I'll miss you too.

He was grinning throughout the whole time we were talking.

I kept hitting his arm. I bet I was unconsciously flirting. =-=;

June was there the whole time, looking at the two of us.

Later on, she told me that she was so happy because she was happy for me and I find that really cute of her. :)

She got to take a picture with Sam too, although, she stopped liking him a long time ago.

Talking with Law was my highlight for that entire evening.

He looked at me at times quite often after that.

Then, I went around, talking and taking photos before I went home.

Yes, I feel really happy and extremely blessed that this happened cause now I know that it's really okay to communicate with him through Facebook and texts but of course I won't do it all the time.

However, I feel a bit sad.

Initially, it was cause I thought he and Angel had something going on but according to Skye, Angel likes one of Skye's ex-crush so there's no way there's anything between them.

That news cheered me up a bit but somehow, I still feel sad and I'm not too sure why.

At least I have this memory preserved and to be eternally kept inside a photo.

I cannot thank June enough for doing that for me.

Thank you so so so much.

Now, I can be sure that I have no regrets whatsoever.

I can actually imagine how it'd have turned out if I never did anything.

I'd be here, feeling all sad and pathetic and regretting a whole lot.

I feel proud of myself for accomplishing something that I never thought I'd ever do, something that I thought was really impossible at the start of this year.

He doesn't mind keeping in contact with me and I feel relieved that I didn't confess to him.

Now, I just need to build a friendship with him.

It'll be slightly difficult now that I don't see him a lot but there'll surely be a way.

Need to sleep now cause I have mooting tomorrow. :)

PS. I received a lot of "you're really sweet" compliments from a lot of seniors and it feels good. :)