Battleship

Got screwed by mom cause I went out with my friends to watch Rihanna act in Battleship which was a quite okay movie if you love gun fights and all (especially if you like Transformers).


Somehow, going out with them turned out to be one of the best things yet that's happened to me this week.


For one, I don't feel so depressed about the whole thing.


Second, I don't really feel all so dramatic about what I'm going to do tomorrow.


I mean, I still like him cause this feeling is really hard to shake off (especially since he's a really nice person), but, I'm not going to be some meany by ignoring him completely or making it obvious that I'm ignoring him.


In a way, maybe, but not as extreme as I had initially planned to do.


My initial plan won't work anyway since I'll be coming to college late. =-=;


I wonder if he'll wonder if I don't text him tomorrow.


I mean, it's kind of like a routine, you know, wishing him good luck and asking how his exam was.


Yeah... I'll miss that routine. :')


And I'm feeling quite calm now really even though I didn't get to talk to Helen last night (she was fast asleep).


As for me, it took some time for me before I finally went to sleep, listening to all my nostalgic songs.


I felt really awful in the morning.


When I went to visit my sister and her team, their energy really affected me and I got frustrated and upset (they weren't bad, it's just that they were trying to portray those emotions and they were really good).


I got very depressed because all these flashbacks of how I treated him and how I expected him to treat me went through my mind.


Like the times when he helped me and the times when he smiled and grinned.


Especially the times when he smiled and grinned at me.


Suddenly, I can see his face vividly in my mind.


The way how his smiles and grins are slightly lopsided. How his eyes sparkle when he's excited or when he's pissed off. His awkward slouch.


I realise now why I was so attracted to him.


He was being himself.


The first time I got crushed by a guy that I like (I didn't confess to him, just that I gave up hope), I changed for the worse.


In Law's case, I feel like I need to improve even more.


That's why I'm actually exercising and studying more now.


Cause, I hope that the next time he sees me, he'll at least regret for a bit.


I want to be myself. Not a changed-for-the-worse person.


But I don't hate him.


He treated me very nicely and I'm so thankful for that.


I feel like I have matured a bit more.


I don't want to be mean to him and treat him badly.


Okay, going to play Dragon Nest before I sleep. :)